The Dirt Road to Paradise

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed." 1 Peter 3-7

Gardens at Imbabazi in Rwanda

There are gardens at a former orphanage in Rwanda which sit on a foothill at the bottom of a volcano. The only way to get to this beautiful paradise is a long, windy, bumpy dirt road. Although the road is only a few miles long, driving down it is a long process due to its poor condition. But the gardens are an incredible sight, and the journey down the bumpy dirt road is suddenly forgotten when you take in your first breath while standing before the awe-inspiring landscape.

*****

When I traveled to Rwanda in May of 2012, I nearly missed visiting this orphanage. I was not feeling very well that day, and, due to illness, I feared the long bus ride on the bumpy dirt road. That morning at breakfast, I wavered between whether to go with the team or stay at the hotel. I ultimately decided to brave the adventure and face the bumpy dirt road.

Had I stayed at the hotel, I would have missed the brightly colored flowers, the crisp fog over the volcano's shadow, the joyful playing of music with the children, and the luscious green landscape that was so carefully tended to by the groundskeepers. Had I stayed at the hotel, I would have missed a glimpse of paradise.

So often, I catch Christians (including myself) praying asking God to "pave a path" for us. While praying for God to reveal His Will to those who love Him is good to practice, this particular wording of the prayer is the part which has begun to trip me up: "pave a path."

What if God's intended route for us to His paradise is not a smoothly paved path, but a bumpy dirt road?

Looking at the life of Jesus, His path to the Father's Will was certainly not a smooth one. He faced ridicule, persecution, and even death in order that God's Sovereign Will would come to pass. Jesus' life was none other than a bumpy dirt road- perhaps even the bumpiest dirt road any person has ever had to walk! He was completely innocent of wrongdoing, yet carried every single sin which we have ever committed and have yet to commit with him on the Cross. Now that is a bumpy dirt road.

The Archbishop of Cambrai, France, during the seventeenth century, Francois de Salignac de La Mothe Fenelon, was a spiritual advisor to a handful of members of the Court of Louis the Fourteenth. To these individuals, he wrote a letter containing the following statements regarding bearing our own crosses of hardship, as Jesus did for us:

"A cross which comes from God ought to be welcomed without any concern for self. And when you accept your cross this way, even though it is painful, you will find that you can bear it in peace. But when you receive your cross unwillingly, you will find it to be doubly severe. The resistance within is harder to bear than the cross itself! But if you recognize the hand of God, and make no opposition to His Will, you will have peace in the midst of affliction."

 As followers of Christ, we have to be willing to take the bumpy dirt road. The road may require extra travel time, and we may have to endure several bumps along the way. It will require endurance. It will require relying on God's strength. But the Destination! The Paradise waiting at the end is worth it!

Imagine you are a child taking a ten-hour road trip with your family to Disney World. Those ten hours... in the car... as a child... while anticipating arrival at "the happiest place on earth..." likely feel like the most grueling ten hours of your life. You are constantly questioning, "Are we there yet?" But when that fateful moment comes, and you arrive, the ten-hour car ride is pushed to the very back of your mind. Your focus shifts to the excitement of where you are and who you are going to see (Mickey Mouse)!

I imagine arrival in Heaven will be a similar, yet far more glorious, experience. Suddenly, the bumpy dirt road will not matter anymore. It will be completely forgotten. Instead, our focus will lie on Our Brilliant Creator with whom we finally have the chance to see face to face and spend eternity with! Where you are and Who you are going to see will take precedence over the journey it took to get there.

Until that day, we may be required to travel down a few bumpy dirt roads. We may be required to bear more than a few crosses. But do not resist those crosses. Carry them with dignity. Have perspective to know that you carry them with a Great Purpose.

*****

Gardens at Imbabazi in Rwanda

There are gardens at a former orphanage in Rwanda which sit on a foothill at the bottom of a volcano. The only way to get to this beautiful paradise is a long, windy, bumpy dirt road. Although the road is only a few miles long, driving down it is a long process due to its poor condition. But the gardens are an incredible sight, and the journey down the bumpy dirt road is suddenly forgotten when you take in your first breath while standing before the awe-inspiring landscape.

Cambodia - July 28, 2013

[The following post is an excerpt from my journal as I traveled to Cambodia. The inconsistency in the entry title and datestamp is due to limited internet access while I was on the trip. These experiences were documented in real time, and I am posting photoblogs now that I have returned. In order to protect all those involved with the organization that rescues children from sex slavery and works to prevent others from being trafficked, I have intentionally omitted specific names and locations.]

Sunday, July 28, 2013 - Phnom Penh, Cambodia

"If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing." 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

I've heard the more you give love, the more capacity you have to love. Loving is a self-sustaining process. I believe this to be true, much like the competitors in the annual July 4th Hot Dog Eating Contest on Coney Island train for the contest by stretching their stomachs and, thus, their capacity to eat hot dogs quickly. We give love in order that we can love bigger.

This has proven itself to be very true in my life. It seems that the wider spread my love goes, the wider my capacity to love becomes. I now have pieces of my heart in the North America, Africa, and Asia, and I feel like I have so much more love to give. My heart is overflowing, almost to a literal sense! I want to show love to every person I see!

But, the funny thing about love is, it often requires a conscious choice. Often it is not the natural response. Scars can inhibit us from giving love because we are afraid it will not be handled with care. Loving is vulnerable.

In his book The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis said, "To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable."

Believe me- locking your heart in a safe is no way to live. I've tried it. It removes the very purpose God created us for. And without purpose, we have nothing to live for. If we refuse to be vulnerable enough to love others and, instead, lock our heart away in a dark casket, nothing we say carries weight any longer.

God created us to love. Our entire being is meant to give Him honor and glory. He commands us, out of that honor and glory, to build disciples of all nations. Choose to love. Choose to be vulnerable.

The possibility of a wrung or broken heart can be terrifying, especially to those with scars from past hurts. To those with particularly sensitive hearts, loving is a great risk. But the beauty of pure, uninhibited love is being willing to have your heart mangled in the process of showing others who Jesus is. We can be confident that in such obedience, God, the Ultimate Healer, will heal any resulting scabs or bruises and make our hearts more complete than they were to begin with.

Cambodia - July 27, 2013

[The following post is an excerpt from my journal as I traveled to Cambodia. The inconsistency in the entry title and datestamp is due to limited internet access while I was on the trip. These experiences were documented in real time, and I am posting photoblogs now that I have returned. In order to protect all those involved with the organization that rescues children from sex slavery and works to prevent others from being trafficked, I have intentionally omitted specific names and locations.]

Saturday, July 27, 2013 - Phnom Penh, Cambodia

"He has told us that you always have pleasant memories of us and that you long to see us, just as we also long to see you." 1 Thessalonians 3:6b
 

You know those moments you wish you could physically wrap up, tie with a bow, and carry with you to open whenever you wish? While I have had many such moments on this trip, tonight was a very special one of those moments.

The little gentleman himself (first decribed in this post) has stolen my heart. This little 13-year-old boy has proven to be more of a man than some grown adult men will ever be. Yet, he is still just a child and has a childish innocence which I adore.

We had a birthday party for our translator tonight. At the party, the little gentleman broke out of his shell and danced like there will be no tomorrow. He even taught me a silly dance. It was hilarious, yet charming at the same time. This young boy is destined for greatness in the Kingdom of God, there is no doubt in my mind. I can already see it growing within him.

His simultaneous dancing, laughing, and smiling tonight made for a perfect gift-wrapped moment. I pray I never forget it.

The following are some pictures from the birthday party.

The following are a few pictures from a prayer walk we took around Phnom Penh. Along the river, there are flags representing many different nations. The presence of the American flag reminded me that the same God who watches over me back at home is the God whose presence can be made known in Cambodia. We prayed for various specific areas, groups of peoples, as well as the country as a whole. I would appreciate if you would join me in continuing to pray for Cambodia.

Cambodia - July 14, 2013

[The following post is an excerpt from my journal as I traveled to Cambodia. The inconsistency in the entry title and datestamp is due to limited internet access while I was on the trip. These experiences were documented in real time, and I am posting photoblogs now that I have returned. In order to protect all those involved with the organization that rescues children from sex slavery and works to prevent others from being trafficked, I have intentionally omitted specific names and locations.]

Sunday, July 14, 2013 - en route to Cambodia

"Once more Jesus put his hands on the man’s eyes. Then his eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly." Mark 8:25

Here I go embarking on a new journey!  I wish I could say that I was overwhelmed with excitement.  Don't get me wrong- I am not dreading this trip by any means, but, rather, I am entering the mission field with a peaceful lack of expectations.  I know that God has designed the weeks ahead, so I am able to trust that He has the details under control.  I think the fact that this is my second time overseas is also contributing to the peace.

Of one other thing I am certain: The Lord has blessed me with the gift of tears.  Throughout the course of my adult life, I've viewed this as both a blessing and a curse.  After four years on the job, I am, to this day, known at my place of work as "the girl who cried during training."  Ah yes, sensitivity can be quite a curse.  I am well aware that the nature of this trip (working with girls who have been rescued from sex slavery as well as seeing the effects of poverty with regard to trafficking) in addition to this little "gift" of mine may prove to be a lethal combination.  However, God has given me the gift of sensitivity for a purpose, and that is reason enough to believe that He will be glorified through it.  Only time will tell just how all of this will come into play.

It's a clear day, so throughout my first one-hour flight, I've been able to see the earth from the plane.  I can see houses, rivers, schools, and highways.  The funny thing is, though, even over the city where I have lived for 24 years, I can hardly identify landmarks from this altitude.  Perspective is funny like that.  It can completely change the appearance of something familiar to be virtually unrecognizable.  On the other hand, a closer perspective can bring so much insight into something you have only seen from a distance.

I know a lot of information about human trafficking.  I have read statistics.  I have seen it in the news.  I have read emails about my friends' experiences in Cambodia.  But until I see its ugliness with my own eyes, I don't think I will understand the weight it can have in the lives it touches.  I will probably never be able to fully grasp that weight unless I, myself, become a victim.  However, I imagine that this trip will provide a new perspective and will help remove some layers of the veil from my understanding.  In fact, I pray it does exactly that.

Praising God's Character

Sarah said, “God has brought me laughter, and everyone who hears about this will laugh with me.”
Genesis 21:6

No, you are not experiencing deja vu. Yes, my last post began with this same Scripture. As I was meditating on it, God revealed multiple vantage points. In this wonderful verse, Sarah is praising God after she has given birth at the age of ninety. However, I find it intriguing that instead of saying, "God has brought me a son," she says, "God has brought me laughter."  Sarah is praising God for who He is, not what He provided.

I often feel as if my prayers are selfish. I'll admit it; I don't pray for others as much as I should. I often pray for my own needs and wants first. Sometimes I completely forget to thank God and acknowledge who He is and how faithful He has always been. I talk with God about my own life in a much larger proportion than I talk with Him about the lives of those around me. There is a common problem here: I am the top priority of my prayers. However, the two greatest commandments  are to (1) Love God, and; (2) Love others as you love yourself.  That makes me number two.

I have learned that poor motives usually yields a poor result.  When I was in high school, I joined the recycling club for the mere perk of having a permanent hall pass to roam the school during study hall. I could not have cared less about the recycling responsibilities; I just wanted the excuse to have free reign of the school for three hours a week. Because I joined the club for the wrong reason, I did a poor job fulfilling my responsibilities of emptying the recycling bins in the classrooms.  They were often overflowing, causing recyclables to be thrown into the trash cans.

Scripture teaches that God examines your motives.  James 4:3 says, "When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures." Am I praying for the purpose of getting something from God, or am I spending time with God because I love Him? Am I expecting something from God in return for each good deed, or am I serving Him for who He is and what He has already done for me? If God does not give me what I ask for, will I turn my back and forget about Him? On the other hand, if God does gives me what I ask for, will I turn my back and forget about Him?

Don't get me wrong- you should ask God for help. You should thank God and recognize Him for His specific provisions. You should take note of blessings you receive and attribute them to God. However, if someone asks you why you love your best friend, you will likely say something along the lines of "she is selfless" or "he always knows how to make me laugh." It would be absurd to answer, "I love my best friend because (s)he spends a lot of money on me." You love people for who they are, not what they do for you.

Why not apply the same principle to your relationship with God? Tell Him how much you love Him. Learn about His character. Praise Him for who He is before you present your requests to Him. Pray simply because you want to spend time with Him, not always because you need something from Him. It's time to start examining our motives. We cannot hide anything from God, so why try?  If we are honest with ourselves, we will realize that He has already provided much more than we could ever give in return. He has saved us, even when we did not deserve it! How can we possibly neglect to put Him first?